My DD214

Veterans should be a thing of the past.

A week of thanks. And fun.

This is the first in a series intended to go for a week. It will most likely wither and die before Thanksgving™ gets here, because I am a generally a bit of a bum. Anyway, here’s today’s “Thing I am thankful for”… Really it’s better if you watch this on weebls stuff, the loop effect really adds to it.

21 November, 2008 8:59 PM Posted by | Clay Recommends:, Hash is Awesome, I lack creativity and/or attention to detail, I love me, Just a thought.., LEGALIZE IT!!!, Movies, Plan for global domination | , | Leave a comment

DaVinci Code decyphered: It’s crap

As I have predicted (not that it was a particularly difficult prediction to make), The DaVinci Code is apparently a steaming pile of dung. The final big warning sign on this one was the lack of advanced screenings for critics, but now that the reviewers have had their chance the reviews are almost uniformly scathing.

If you know me at all, then you realize that this is good news. I revel in reading reviews of bad movies. And while there's a great selection over at Rotten Tomatoes, take my advice and read Devin Faraci's take over at CHUD. It is bar none the finest bad movie review I've ever read. Allow me to provide you with some highlights.

The Da Vinci Code is a terrible movie. It’s a movie that’s too stupid to appreciate it’s own stupid origins, and so it takes itself completely seriously. The stupider things get, the more seriously the movie takes itself, and the more seriously it takes itself, the funnier it is. The movie isn’t content with its own stupidity – it actively assumes that the audience is operating on a simian mental level (although considering how bad the writing in Brown’s original novel is, maybe the movie is overestimating the fanbase)...

Meanwhile, Jean Reno shows up as French law dictates that he must appear in any Hollywood movie shot in that country. Other great actors appear and shame themselves and their families for generations to come.

It's a shame that the movie sounds so tedious, because I would have enjoyed going to see a movie that was terrible in a Battlefield: Earth style. There's something so decadent about going to see an exceptionally bad film whose budget could have eradicated polio from Africa.

18 May, 2006 12:18 PM Posted by | Movies | 5 Comments

Heavy reading and light thinking

Here's a couple of interesting reads and some random thoughts.

  • From the New York Times: The contents of some old trunks found in the basement of Steve McQueen's house reveal detailed plans for the epic motorcycle adventure movie he had planned for years.
  • From Slate: The growing marginalization of the independent bookstore.
  • Writer Douglas Rushkoff (fascinating Wikipedia bio here) has an amusing and thought-provoking rant on the obsolescence of faith and religion.
  • My parents saw Mission Impossible 3 before I did because my New York City friends are too put off by Tom Cruise and/or overly cynical about Hollywood blockbusters. The other impediment is that I refuse to go to the movies alone.
  • I've read Ahmadinejad's letter. It's still digesting.

15 May, 2006 12:30 PM Posted by | Just a thought.., Linkage, Movies | Leave a comment

Trailer Tuesday… (on Wednesday)

  • This new Superman trailer made me a believer. I was never particularly excited about this project, despite the involvement of Bryan Singer. But this trailer completely sold me. It's worth checking out just for the experience of seeing Kevin Spacey channelling Gene Hackman.
  • A new trailer for M. Night Shyamalan's new flick The Lady in the Water is up, and I think it's great. People who dislike Shyamalan's movies ("I knew there was going to be a twist. Why does he always have to have a twist?") shouldn't even bother to click. In fact, never go to the movies again. Find a quiet place and die.

10 May, 2006 11:43 AM Posted by | Movies | Leave a comment


Wes Anderson, the man who wrought Rushmore (one of my top 2 or 3 favorite films of all time, locked in an eternal struggle with Yojimbo and Pee Wee's Big Adventure), has made a two-minute ad for American Express. (via)

27 April, 2006 7:32 AM Posted by | Linkage, Movies | Leave a comment

Transformers movie update (again)

IGN Filmforce claims to have the inside track on the voice cast for next year's Spielberg-produced Transformers flick (via CHUD's Dave Davis): "..veteran Jon Voight, man-mountain Michael Clarke Duncan, high-haired Las Vegas hunk Josh Duhamel, plus Bernie Mac, Tyrese Gibson, John Turturro[.]"

That's right. Go back and read it again if you have to, but that line most definitely has the words "John Turturro" in it. So let's recap:

  1. Transformers feature-length movie,
  2. Produced by Stephen Spielberg,
  3. With John Turturro as the voice of one of the Transformers.

If they can somehow work Scarlett Johansson and Wilco into this, they'll have to sedate me prior to entering the theater so that my over-stimulated endorphin center doesn't accidentally plunge me into a coma.


Correction: As much as I love Wilco, I realize that they might not be 100% appropriate for a Transformers movie soundtrack. In keeping with the 1980s nostaglia goodness theme, I'd like to amend that last sentence so that it reads, "Scarlett Johansson and The Scorpions featuring Eddie Money".

21 April, 2006 12:17 PM Posted by | Movies | 5 Comments

S for Subversive

  Although I’ve made a half-assed effort to get back into comic books over the last couple of years, there’s plenty of “must-read” stuff that’s escaped my attention. Apparently, the V for Vendetta graphic novels fall under that heading. My favorite movie reviewer (Devin Faraci) at my favorite movie review site (CHUD) has written up a very interesting editorial after attending a screening of the soon-to-be-released V for Vendetta movie. Here’s some of what Devin had to say:

It’s shocking that a film like V For Vendetta, in which the hero can be described in no other terms but terrorist, has been made by a major movie studio, which is itself a part of a major, world-dominating corporation. Either the folks at Warner Bros and Time-Warner weren’t paying a lot of attention or they just don’t think that a movie will make any bit of difference at this point. I couldn’t disagree more, and I have to tell you that if I was still actively working as a political organizer I would be standing outside theaters showing V and handing out anti-Bush and anti-Iraq War pamphlets to exiting moviegoers. Sure, this film is about a fictional fascist state that denies its people basic liberties and makes them live in fear, and sure it’s set in the London of the future, but there’s no hiding the fact that the film’s timeline is one that begins today.

After reading that whole spiel, I can honestly say that this is the first movie I’ve been excited about seeing since Murderball. And if tweaking conservatives isn’t enough for you, the movie also features Natalie Portman with a shaved head. I think it’s hot. Infer from that what you will.

Here’s the link to Devin’s write-up, and here’s a link to the most recent trailer for V for Vendetta.

See also: Movie Review: V for Vendetta

27 February, 2006 8:26 PM Posted by | Linkage, Movies | Leave a comment