My DD214

Veterans should be a thing of the past.

Jesus don’t truck with no dove-sellers

In honor of Will’s excellent post, I thought I’d point out the specific verse that he alluded to and simultaneously take a nice opportunity to plug the excellent Skeptic’s Annotated Bible.

The verse in question (as per the King James version) is:

And Jesus went into the temple of God, and cast out all them that sold and bought in the temple, and overthrew the tables of the moneychangers, and the seats of them that sold doves and said unto them, It is written, My house shall be called the house of prayer; but ye have made it a den of thieves. —Matthew 21:12-13

Nice post, William. Props to my pops for helping me find the exact passage.

30 December, 2005 9:40 PM Posted by | We don't need no educations | Leave a comment

I might have found the light.

Well, I’ve been absent from the blog for a couple weeks and I want to atone. I’ve become an MOA Christian. I know, I know. You’re all thinking,

Q: “But Will, how can you be an MOA Christian if you are also an atheist?”

A: Well, the answer is simple: MOA Christians are retards.

Q: Will, I know what a Christian is, but what is an MOA Christian?

A: An MOA Christian is a believer who attends mass at Camp Snoopy in the Mall of America.

Q: But Will, isn’t putting a Christian Church in the Mall of America a little askew from the idea that, umm… what was that guy’s name again…? Oh Yeah, JESUS CHRIST didn’t want a store inside his Church?

A: Yes, but the loophole is that he didn’t say that we couldn’t have a church inside the store.

Another reason why I’ve converted to this MOA Christian lifestyle, is because thier value system is more “on par” with my own values. Things like having a big screen plasma tv in the church window so that they can pummel passersby with thier media presentations and filmed dramatic reenactments of “acual life events” such as 1. problems with your children, 2. problems with drugs, 3. the list goes on.

Yes folks, the River Church is a “a safe place to figure out what life’s about”. So the next time you feel like donating to a charitable organization to help out with our collective and shared burdens, DON’T! Stop by the River Church in the MOA and figure out what life is about.

30 December, 2005 7:55 AM Posted by | Just a thought.. | 2 Comments